Helpful

Hello pips,
So this is today's blog is going to be about being helpful. I figured I should get it out of the way before I forget. Before I begin, I was reading Genesis yesterday then realised that the word cleave was used instead of cling. I thought well they mean similar things but curiously I looked up cleave and found an interesting meaning. "to be faithful to" . This is additional information to us. When I started thinking about helping a question came to mind. Who do responsibilities end and helping start? What I might call helping might be rsponsibility to someone else and vice versa. So on this topic there is no right or wrong; it's just one perspective on the topic. In marriage who decides what is helping or what individual responsibilities are? I know that in most families today, they share their financial obligations. Do people do the same with everything in the home? Is cooking naturally a woman's responsibility as well as cleaning and looking after the kids, ironing,washing, school run etc... I'm sure a lot of people would say yes to most of these questions. Let's look at this from the biblical angle for one moment. Gen 2:18 says And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. So this means that a woman is designed to be a mans helper. Hmm interesting.

So knowing this, how is that a woman is then expected to do everything and the man offers help when it suits him? When you are dating you call yourselves partners. The man helps in the kitchen and tidies his house. The moment he says "I do" the scenario changes. How did this come about? Hmm. We know that love is helping, the question then is how and when do we help? The house belongs to two people. So do the kids; therefore why don't we work together? Why doesn't the first person to wake up get the kids ready? Not to say the other person takes advantage of this or you two work out what works for you: Make dinner arrangements, surprise yourselves, be spontaneous. Have a laugh whilst doing things. Make it fun. In a nut shell, I believe the home should be equal responsibilities because we are one. Food for thoughts. Adios..

Grand Finale on Love

So to conclude this topic is a short summary. Verse 7 says "Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things". What better way to summarise Love than this.beareth all things; not certain things just incase you are confused as to where to draw the line. Believeth all things; 100% trust in all they do. Hopeth all things. Hope in love and your ability to build a strong home for your family. This is what God says love is. If we follow them dillegently we are bound to live happily till death do us part. With this new insight, Love is not just a four letter word to me. But something I'd like to explore and learn about each day. I hope a few of us can say the same. That's all for now. This is just an extra bit. Full blog on tomorrow. Remain blessed.

Love Part 2

Hi everyone,

Hope we all had a good weekend. Well mine was fine went for Olympics fun day out with my fam.  All glory to God. So we are continuing with 1st Corinthians 13. We stopped at verse 4 yesterday.  So verse 5 begins by saying Love does not behave unseemly. Unseemly is defined as inappropriate for time and place. I cannot believe this is in the bible. I have read this chapter too many times and have not really given it much thought. I know this one because I have experienced it myself: so I was out with my h and I do it sometimes. We raise our voices at our partners in public. But reading this now is giving me a different insight because now we know it is wrong. Making someone feel embarrassed or feel bad in public by things we say or do isn't love. The next bit quotes "seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked and thinketh no evil". So love is not selfish, meaning your partner should be your reasons. Reason yo u wake uo in the morning, reason you eat, reason you go to work and reason you go to bed. I like the sound of that. Love is not easily provoked; my suggestion for this one is to smile always, think how you would feel if it was you in that situation. Lastly, thinketh no evil. We each have to understand what  evil is and what our minds create as evil. It's amazing what we think in our heads all in the name of  no own would know. I tell you now; God knows and your thoughts are what he takes to be what you want . Please do not ruin another's life by thinking evil.

Moving on to verse 6 says love rejoice not in iniquity but rejoiceth in truth. I don't know much about this but I will try my best. In the world we live in today, sinful things are now becoming normal practice. I.e: infidelity is seen as something normal and to be accepted. I guess it is more about accepting our mistakes and not making excuses when we know right out that wrong. Also standing for the truth because only then would we experience true love. I know most of us may find ourselves in situations where pressure  makes us do things that are wrong. I tell you today in your quiet time pls ask God for forgiveness and directions and apologise to your spouse whom you have wronged because they are not just ur better half; you both have become one (Gen2:24) . Next is sleekest not her own.first thing that comes to mind is supporting your spouse to pursue their dreams. So question is how many of us know what our spouse's dreams are?  If we support each other to find what makes us happy, we would always be happy with each other and appreciate one another. The only way to do this is to talk to each other. Find time when you both can seat alone and just have a friendly chat. I would say this should be done early in the relationship but eh better late than never. I have also found that talking puts two people on the same page instead of living on assumptions. Financially, physically, spiritually, mentally and with achievements. That's all folks. Till we meet again. Remain Blessed.

Love

Hello my people, hope everyone had a good week? That you are reading this means u are still hanging there. No matter what the devil throws at you just remember that the bible tells us in Galatians 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. So hang in there. Today we are going to talk about LOVE. A word I cannot tell you I understand fully so I will go by the bible and try and see how we can apply what it says to our reality. So nothing defines love more than 1st Corinthians 13. Here we go; verse 1-3 tells us that if we have all the skills and talent and sacrifice ourselves without love, we profit nothing. So in marriage this means that your qualifications and achievements do not count in the home. Hmm, very interesting because I have heard phrases like he/she is up to my standard intellectually. This excuse is sometimes used to justify infidelity. Verse 3 talks about giving ones self for sacrifice; all I can think of here is if we become philanthropists to the world and treat ouw spouses like trash, there is no reward there. This is quite common and now I think about it "funny". As the old adage goes " charity begins at home". How easy is it for you to be out with your spouse and think "if only they behaves like this at home, or spoke to me with such respect and love? If you are on the giving side of this matter, please have a rethihk.

Verse 4 says "love suffereth long and is kind. Envieth not; vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up. I don't know if there is a reason why it starts with ENDURANCE but personally, I believe endurance plays a very important role in marriage. This is because in marriage, you will need to endure things that maybe would kick you off on a good day. Because marriage is a learning institution, it is very important for us to endure things our partners would do in the name of love. Next is KINDNESS. So the dictionary definitions is someone who is indulgent, considerate and helpful. Very nice words don't you think? This is making sense to me now. To show kindness you have to portray these three characters. So love means to indulge your partner, be considerate towards their faults and mistakes and to be helpful. Helpful to me is a topic we need to explore on it's own. But for now let us sleep on this. To be contd.... Have a blessed week ahead may the God of all peace grant us all peace IJN.

Third Party input

Hello people, sorry for the delay. Today's blog would be short cos there isn't much to say on this topic but as the Bible says "he that hath an ear let him hear. So third party can come in different forms: friends family,colleagues and strangers. Not all of these people would mean harm but the truth is only God can direct you on the right action to take or the right thing to say. Some may say "if it where me" it isn't them;others "when this sort of thing happened to me" you don't know the facts of their situation. Advice is very easy to give but majority of the time; people do not practice what they preach. The person giving the advice only knows your part of the story and to be truthful, when we narrate a situation; we only say what suits us. Whereas if we were talking to the all knowing God he would know the truth therefore able to minister the Roth path to our hearts. Unless we refuse to listen for selfish purposes.

God ministers to our hearts a lot of times but we fail to listen or hear him. Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah. (Psalm 4:4 KJV). This is how God communicates with us. What you call instinct is actually God talking to you. Only you and God know what is best for you. Seek ye the Lord while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near: (Isaiah 55:6 KJV). The bible gives us simple instructions to follow. The next time you are confused about anything, take it to the Lord in pray because he cares for you. Even if someone offers you advice, ask God for his directions. I have found myself giving advise and when I though about it, it didn't seem like the right one so I called the person the next day to tell them. I thought to myself"would I really do this if it was me" and the answer was NO. That's it for now. So I don't start blabbing. Goodnight to all.

Consequences

Hi all, writing about maturity got me thinking.growing up in Africa a marriage was only bad if a man beat his wife or if one party is unfaithful. Now I have come to understand that people are faced with different types of abuse in a marriage. Emotional,verbal and financial are types that can be found in a marriage. Emotional abuse comes in the form of saying or doing things that would belittle the other person. If you abuse your partner in any form please stop because it hurts more coming from the one you love. What we need to do is have a little more patience with each other, think before we speak, help each other out, talk to each other about everything and show love in more ways than we do now. The consequences of our words and actions would be seen in our kids in the near future. To them we can't do wrong. Let's adopt 1st Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up. What tells us that God has plans for every aspect of our lives including marriage? We hide under selfishness and ego when none of that really matters. I will stop here because I wrote a second part but it didn't save and I can't remember it word for word so sorry guys. See u soon..

Age Vs Maturity

Hello everyone, hope all is well? With the Olympics on the way this whole town is chaotic. Travelling takes almost double the usual time. It's killing me cos I'm coming home extra tired which I can do without. Before I start with today's topic, I am glad to tell you that anyone can leave a comment now. Hurray... Until today, I used to always say age was a big factor in marriage. However after a long telephone conversation to a close family, we decided that maturity and not age was the important factor. Whether your partner is one day or fifty years older or younger than you doesn't matter. What matters is their level of maturity. My daily reading for yesterday said "if you want a mature partner, you have to be mature yourself. Basically, whatever you want in your partner should first reflect in you. If we take time to think and make notes of what we expect from our partners; the first question would then be " would they see these traits in me? If you take on this approach, we wouldn't expect the undoable from our partners.

It's simply a matter of do unto others as you want others to do unto you or what the bible says to remove the dirt in your eyes before you see the one in your neighbours. Luke 6:41. this takes me back to one of my early blogs about dwelling on both strengths and not weaknesses. Your wife can clean but not cook and you on the other hand know a thing or two about cooking; why don't you work something out? Your husband leaves his clothes about but takes out the rubbish on time and gets the kids ready ontime. Wow why don't we compromise? These little things are so irrelevant but once you start counting, it can destroy good things. It goes from hmm yesterday he/ she did this, to today he/ she did not do that. All that really matters is how you guys decide to live together and raise your family because your folks have done the best they can and it is now up to you both to learn from each other. So that's all for today and hope this helps someone. Aurovior all. Look forward to next blog on third party damages. Remain blessed.